Case Study: Margaret’s Journey to Sexual Confidence & Empowerment

Carla Crivaro
3 days ago
3 min read

Margaret came to me struggling with painful sex with her boyfriend, frequent UTIs and thrush infections and chronic anxiety, compounded by ongoing fatigue and ME flare-ups.

During sex, the inside of her vagina would burn and she began to wonder if sex was simply 'not for her'. Past partners had often pushed themselves on her before she was ready, leaving her without tools to assert boundaries. Sex had always felt like it was for someone else, never for her. As a self-identified people-pleaser, Margaret struggled to express her desires and feelings, both inside and outside the bedroom.

Interestingly, when drinking, she noticed a version of herself that was confident and bold - a side she rarely accessed in daily life. Despite others commenting on her attractiveness, Margaret didn’t identify as sexy. She carried guilt over not being able to give her boyfriend what he wanted and often judged herself harshly.

Her goal was clear: to prioritise herself, understand her sexuality and experience pleasure and confidence in her body.

It became evident that Margaret’s body was signalling 'no' where she could not consent freely. Her boyfriend’s attempts at pleasuring her, especially orally, were ineffective and prior conversations about her needs had been met with defensiveness. To avoid conflict, she stayed silent, walking on eggshells. Penetrative sex was painful, partly because she wasn’t warmed up and had relied on porn for arousal.

The Work & Archetypes

The Queen - Asking for What She Wants

We began by connecting Margaret to her ‘fight’ response - not as aggression but as a way to stand up for herself and counter the fawn response she had developed. She learned that expressing her desires was not selfish and that she could assert boundaries confidently. Slowly, Margaret started speaking up for what she wanted and initiating intimacy, stepping into the Queen within her.

The Temptress - Connecting to Her Sexiness

Through guided somatic practices, Margaret reconnected to her sexy, confident self. Home assignments focused on deepening her connection to eros, sensuality and aliveness. She began to trust her body’s pleasure pathways, embrace her erotic energy and explore sex as something that could feel good for her too. Margaret learned to inhabit her Temptress fully - owning her magnetism and confidence without guilt.

The Mother - Creating Safety to Listen to Her Body

We also cultivated her inner Mother - the part of her that could hold space for herself, listen to her body and create safety. Margaret learned to honour her sensations, recognise her boundaries and relax into pleasure without fear. This allowed her body to release tension, infections to disappear and her chronic fatigue to reduce. She could now make empowered choices in both sex and life, fully trusting her intuition.

Broader Transformation

As Margaret embraced her Queen, Temptress and Mother, profound changes unfolded:

She communicated her needs clearly and confidently, which improved her sexual experiences.
Standing up for herself led to the end of an unsupportive relationship, opening space for new possibilities.
She left a stressful social care job and expanded her aesthetics side business into a thriving venture.
Her chronic fatigue and ME flare-ups significantly decreased.

Margaret transformed from an anxious, self-doubting, people-pleasing woman into someone who trusted herself, her body and her desires. She now moves through life with confidence, pleasure and empowerment - embodying the Queen, Mother and Temptress in harmony.

Ready to step into your power and trust your body? Book a 1:1 discovery call and start your journey today.